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First I would like to say thank you for the support. I am still a ways off from publishing my work, but this conduit has be a fun piece in the cog, and when I stareted this blog in support of my manuscript Blue Lines in June of 2009, I did not see today, or the wealth of work and experiences I would gather along the way. As my humble thanks, I offer an excerpt of my work from Blue Lines: Thirteen: Beauty in Blue and White:
“Hello love,” Blue interrupted Keypsiia’s solace.
She smiled as she looked up from the uneven wooden bench. The sun’s glow bathed her through the twisted tree barks and haphazard vines that formed the awning that opened to the walkway bordering the south end of the Coker Arboretum and her smile radiated her face as a few leaves floated in their descent to the hidden dirt sidewalk.
Keypsiia’s hair was pulled back into a curly auburn puff at the back of her head as she sat with her legs folded under her form. She was tired and the sinuses behind her nose throbbed from drinking the previous night hanging out with Azul. But, while briefly gazing up to Blue, a large silly grin overtook her face. She reflected back to their brief argument the day prior and how she had wanted to call Blue last night, but that she didn’t have his number. Her heart jumped just seeing him before her. His navy First Down Bubble jacket hung haphazardly ruffled under the straps of his navy backpack and she focused on a brown and white feather that pointed out from it. His hat covered his cornrowed braids and his baggy light blue Ruff Wear jeans careened down his legs, to rest upon his opened boots. Yes, she reflected, this was the man who brought her such joy in just being there.
“Hi Blue, I can’t keep from smiling,” she giggled to herself as she peered back down to her notebook blushing. She knew that he was someone that she wanted in her life, to share her simple joys with him. He was hers to pine for, “now that you are here.” They shared a smile of the coincidence of their meeting.
“Why do you love me Keypsiia,” he frowned.
“For the same reasons that you love me Blue. I just wish that I wasn’t afraid of something that feels so right,” she answered with more courage than she had had the previous day. “I wish that I did not feel pushed into a corner sometimes.”
“Why are you afraid to jump? Why are you afraid of… if it’s me that you want? What brings you so much fear, love?”
“Because…” she thought and before she would allow those words to escape from her lips she countered, “I’m scared Blue, so scared, not only of taking the chance, but of messing it up. Blue, I honestly believe that if I make this jump…it will be my last. Before, at home in Sac, a boyfriend was something I wanted. I loved them, but I didn’t, if you understand what I mean,” he nodded perceptively as their conversation seemed to pick up from their previous afternoon together. “I knew that that was the guy that I would be with there, but I also knew that we would go our separate ways,” she paused and thought of how her words may have come across. Trusting her instincts she continued, “I knew that we would not get married.
“… And then you came along…”
“And, I fill that necessity,” he asked with what she perceived as partially confident. “That want, and that longing and that need that you feel,” he paused looking aimlessly to through the natural awning to the sky momentarily. He then returned his glances to her and continued, “how do you know this…that I can answer what you need?”
“That’s it, I don’t know if you do,” Blue frowned slightly in response to her words, “I just know that I,” Keypsiia gathered her courage to continue, “my feelings are strong for you Blue,” she released in a sigh.
Blue closed his eyes, and she understood that he knew the truth in her simple words. Exhaling, he looked toward the idyllic hues of the orange and red leaves that still hung on to the last life of the fleeting summer. He knew that on the eve of their passing, a virgin love was being born between to souls who were occupying the right space at the perfect time. With Keypsiia’s girlish grin still wide, she closed her eyes and looked skyward to accept the warmth of the sun that seemed to caress her. She smiled at the emancipation of her words, and with thoughts of the frightening, unknown love that separated them from the world now.
“Blue,” she repeated his name and smiled spoonily.
“Yes love,” he nodded.
“Do you understand that my heart jumps every time that I see you? Whether I’m in my room thinking about you, or I just see you. My stomach is in knots, but somehow I’m able to conceal it, and I think to myself maybe this is the day, but I never know.”
“Hopefully there will be more to us than simple friendship and unfulfilled feelings,” he stated smiling as he sat beside her and looked onto her notes to help her study, but in her state she replaced the books in her bag.
“Alright,” Blue said in unstated acknowledgement. “You got a Black,” he asked as he pulled out his lighter.
“Yes,” she smiled as she rummaged through her bag to find the cigar. He lit it as they rose from the bench and began to walk around to the entrance of the Arboretum.
“Here,” he smiled offering her his bottled coffee Frappuccino. “You can have it.” She smiled as she accepted the drink.
They covered various subjects and current events, nothing with any real bearing on the state of their relations. Keypsiia and Blue passed the Black & Mild cigar between one another as they walked and spoke.
“Keypsiia, what do you want from me,” he turned and asked while kicking dirt from his boots.
Keypsiia was visibly annoyed by his question. He had an obscure habit of asking her questions of this nature and she detested it. She proceeded to walk as if the query had not been made. She focused on the sand particles that she had managed to kick up on her shell toe sneakers.
The manuscript Blue Lines is the fictional coming of age narrative of a young California woman Key Yemaya Walker, and her 2 year growing journey through school, love, and life period piece, written by Kenneth Suffern, Jr., taking place at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill between the years of 1997 – 1998. Loosely based on true events, and experiences during that time, told through the eyes and voice of the main female protagonist, a freshman first attending the school.